Get Stuffed!

Or words to that effect is a term generally associated with the infamous ‘middle-finger salute‘.

one finger salute
charming young lady expressing an opinion of authority held by many

Coming from England and being an ex-squaddie I’ve never had a problem understanding this very direct form of communication. Living here in Turkey I find, when watching President Damn Turd Pol (it’s an anagram – you can work it out), that his repeated use of the ‘A-OK’ gesture is very disconcerting. Here in Turkey (and one or two other countries) this is such an insulting gesture as to warrant some severe retribution from the recipient. Why? Because it insinuates that the person is a homosexual and in this macho-culture there are few greater insults.


So, is it any wonder that here, and other places, Herr Adolf Twitler aka Agent Orange is such a figure of derision. As an aside, way back when, President ‘Tricky Dicky’ Nixon arrived on a state visit to Brazil. He burst out the door of Air Force 1 onto the top of the steps gesturing ‘A-OK’ enthusiastically with both hands towards the crowds who were stunned. In Brazil, you see, this gesture is the equivalent of that notorious middle-finger salute. Good start then President ‘Pricky Dicky’!

But, where was I? Oh, yes! Getting stuffed.

Up here at the cabin the young vine leaves are succulent and plentiful so what to do to make good use of them. Right – dolma or stuffed vine leaves. Now, I want to get something straight right from the start – whilst I do the picking of the leaves and happen to be the maestro of the stuffing and rolling, it is J who does the hard and tricky stuff. She produces the delicious stuffing and prepares the leaves to the perfect texture for rolling.

Behind every great thigh-rolling dolma stuffer there toils an unsung hero!


everything you need: leaves, stuffing, olive oil, brush, spoon, herbal tea and half a sticky bun


It is the custom here in Turkey when a young man takes a fancy to a young lady for the girl’s parents to invite the groom with his mum and dad to assess the suitability of the gelin (bride). She is expected to serve up perfect Turkish coffee and perfectly formed, tasty dolma made by her own fair hand. On such things the future of the world hangs!

Although this seems arse-about-face, J and I have long thought that it would be very nice to have a housewife (or house husband) to do the chores and ready the Ovaltine!

Wishful thinking aside, I really must disabuse you of the idea that free-hand is my thing because a couple of years ago I acquired this very useful gadget:

I stopped using the inside of my thigh after J complained about the hairs in her teeth!
it takes years of practice to produce such perfect dolma
cuban cigars
whoever said that rolling dolma wasn’t sexy!
a fine pan-full of Perdomo Cuban Cigars – they look good, taste good and by golly they do you good!

So, that’s it then – I’m off with J to see Ché and Fidel for a rum, a cigar and a good stuffing!

ps No harm in showing the view from the rolling table:


8 thoughts on “Get Stuffed!

  1. That dolma machine looks like a roll up machine on speed…wish I had had that when I used to make them when in France…with recipe given by Turkish friends. Mine varied wildly in..birth and length depending on ehat was happening in the cricket match to which I would have been listening at the time.

    There is a cigar factory in our small town….a terrible disappointment to every male visitor we have taken there…

    I have introduced the bras d’honneur to our little area…I notice it now being in use among motorcyclists pulled up by the transit police under the vehicle restriction regulations. The police know it is not nice, but as yet have not managed to categorise it. God help the motorcyclists when they do…

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  2. Well I just love this post on so many levels. I honestly had noted what president Damn Turd whatever you called him had done. Exceedingly insulting here in Turkey, he probably knows what he’s doing, someone will have him told and then he’ll carry on. He’s like that.
    Hmm now the dolmades not my fave, but I have discovered it now depends who has made them and what time of year they are made.
    Love the cigar rolling concept. Keep it up.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Alan, Actually, I think that sign currently is associated with the European white supremacists. It was used in the horrible Volkswagen ad for the Golf car that the higher ups at VW had to furiously apologize for. Brilliant solution for making perfect dolma. Afiyet olsun!

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